"What do you want to do?" Deji asked me. We've walked this road 3 times already so i know he isn't asking for what i really want in actual fact. He's indirectly telling me he doesn't want it. "Don't ask me what i want to do Deji,you're the man and your stance actually defines everything so I'm asking you right back,WHAT DO YOU WANT"? I yelled back at him.
"Deola,you've always known my stance,so don't ask me.That's why I'm asking what do you want to do". I was bewildered. I felt stupid,used....I could have shot him if i had a gun close to me. How could he? How could Deji tell me he always had a stance? A stance? I broke down in tears.
Deji and I started dating in 2007. He'd just started a job with a private secondary school. He wasn't earning a fat salary but love has always been my topmost priority so i plunged headlong into it. I on the other hand just got a job with the civil service so we were just managing...
If you've never had an abortion before,you're very lucky. It's a traumatizing experience that will haunt one for a very long time. Apart from the physical pain,the psychological trauma is out of this world.Forgiving oneself is another issue entirely. You'll never feel comfortable every time your menstrual period shows up;because you'll feel you'll never 'miss it'. You'll feel punished every time something goes wrong for you.
If i knew all these,why did i go ahead with the second,then third one? You'll think me stupid if i told you the second one was for love.........
So,who should be blamed for an unwanted pregnancy? Is it the guy who said he couldn't climax with a condom or the girl who got tired of using contraceptives?On the other hand,who decides if a child will come into this world? Or better still,who has the ultimate say on abortion?
